My wife and I had flown in through Heathrow on our honeymoon. It had been a really long trip. I seem to recall that we were routed through JFK International. We were hungry and tired. Food first, since you can be sleepy while you eat, but you can’t eat while asleep. We could have eaten at the airport, but didn’t want airport food. We found some little restaurant. My wife ordered something forgettable. I perused the menu for a while until I found it.
A mushroom burger.
I love hamburgers. I wouldn’t say that I’m addicted to them. They aren’t actually my favorite food… but they’re pretty perfect overall. I excel in making them myself. A mushroom burger is going to be great pretty much anywhere. Sauteed mushrooms on a slice of swiss melting on a tasty patty. That’s mighty fine food!
When my burger arrived, I was disappointed, but being polite, I chose not to bring up the problem. My burger didn’t have the promised mushrooms on it. I wasn’t going to complain. I mean… it was food and I was hungry to the point of turning into a zombie. I saw some HP sauce (I love that stuff!) and put a bit on. Then I took a bite.
And froze.
I looked down in horror. My wife was looking at me strangely. I put the burger down and grabbed a fork to claw at the inside of the burger.
It wasn’t a “burger.” Somehow, someone, for some reason that defies logic… had taken mushrooms, chopped them up, and formed them into some kind of patty and cooked it. It was a “burger” made out of a mushroom. Forgetting about the fact that it wasn’t the beef burger I expected, it was awful It was crispy on the outside and sort of… wet on the inside. Not moist. Sludgy?
We can blame the lack of sleep or maybe the gnawing hunger, but I went from zero to outraged in 3.2 seconds. I growled at the waiter, “I need a box for my wife’s meal. Pronto.” We threw her food in a box, I dropped money on the table, and we were out of there. I cursed the entire way to the hotel and ate some crap out of a vending machine there.
People are welcome to take me to task here. I’m sure this is some kind of cultural misunderstanding. Still, if you list it with other beef burgers and don’t have a description, especially near an airport, you should assume that you’re going to be misleading people.
And that’s fine. It was still a damned disappointing meal that I would neverorder again.
*And “homicidally angry” is an example of “hyperbole.” Calm down.
Source:quora.com
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